I had tried to paint myself in pain but it was deeply upsetting. It would have also been concrete documentation - forever - and that's the last thing I wanted to do with this pain. Immortalise it. The pain wasn't staying. It wasn't forever, and there was no way I was going to make it mine. My artwork takes me to happy places, but of course I couldn't ignore these years of my life.
Closure really is something. Feeling like a niggling concern is finally put to rest can be so satisfying, it brings me such calm. Slowly, my pelvic chronic pain niggles are finding their place and providing me with the peace my body and mind needs so I can let go, move on and most of all feel my injury is clearly understood. I had another session with the wonderful Raffaele who continues to treat me fortnightly. I was ready to call the next nerve block last week but after yesterday I'm hopeful again and thinking I was in some kind of a flare. I can't expect (but I will!) that with my effective management flare ups will cease to happen. As I test my capacity and lift my full litres of milk occasionally, walk the dog and go out more often, I've got to expect at some point the body is going to say, 'hang on love, you're lifting too much milk!'
I struggle hearing about people’s pain since my own experience with it. In trying to do my bit to help, I’ve found the world of pain provides endless gifts of empathy, understanding, love and compassion. And the gifts don’t stop [...]
Another year gone by since the pop! Now I know what practitioners mean about peeling onion layers. My onion layers have gone something like this: Removal of pelvic thickened ligament Peripheral stimulation device implant Diagnosis Nerve blocks Medication … Could [...]
Well it's hardly a birthday celebration! But certainly a time to reflect and assess myself and the achievements of PudendalNerve.com.au. The total visits in 12 months total an astounding 21,500 and the search terms are a clear indication that still, so little is understood of Pudendal Neuralgia worldwide. The first note must be of thanks and of course, has to go to my husband Theo. Without Theo's daily help this site simply wouldn't be up and running.... neither would I! Second note worthy thank you, and certainly something that can be celebrated, has to be the beautiful connections I've made in the past year. I've met the most inspiring, energising, kind, compassionate people, whether practitioners, therapists, chronic pain sufferers, or people attached to the pain system, you have been my encouragement and empathy. Your pain and/or knowledge inspire me to continue and get to the bottom of this dreaded pain issue (in the hope of resolving it not only for me but for all of us!), and/or try to voice my improvements for an ignorant WorkCover system. As far as my personal 1st year status goes, I definitely have 'progress' to celebrate; I'm running on Nerve block no. 3, refreshing my pelvis as required with a newly installed bidet, taking minimal amounts of Endep, in much less pain but still much limited with capacity and in need of daily help. Although I still need regular massage, I'm able to work a little from an accommodating home setup, thinking a lot more, delegating-delegating-delegating and finally, but not least, have taken a plunge into the wonderful world of Chinese Medicine which I believe may finally be able to reach my pain. Stay tuned for another update on that soon. (image) Nerve Block Cake & Candle To sum up, here are some stats that may be of interest to my subscribers and visitors (and my very loyal spies!).
Happy... post nerve block No. 3. I'm at 5.3 weeks and have managed to walk daily a few days in a row, practice some extremely mild yoga and have a few meals out without the pathetic fire warning in my pelvis. Could it be? Could it really be? Here's hoping 2013 begins with some pain free magic. Right now, I feel like this... and I wish that everyone who comes across my website, or is a regular reader feels the same. If not, please, remain hopeful.
I’m not yet clear about the effects of Nerve block No. 3, but I’m calling it… I’m going to be positive… I believe I’m building! It’s just a sorta three steps forward and two back situation.. I hope. So far, my building blocks go like this: • Nerve block No. 1 (December 7, 2011), • Nerve block No. 2 (April 18, 2012), • Nerve block No. 3 (November 23, 2012)
With Pudendal Neuralgia, or any other pelvic chronic pain issue, it can be impossible to sit pain free (let alone get away without a flare up). Of course, I'm no pro when it comes to seating, but I've learned a lot from my own experience and from listening to the 'ouch' in my pelvis. The seating I needed, was most often hand-made! (Have a look at the one my gorgeous father in law made, it's the stool with adjustable foot rest!) Although I've worn out, thrown out, tried and tested so many more seating aids, I'm showing the ones that have lasted or worked for a while. These are the ones I often resort to.
So, you think you can see pain hey? Or rather your understanding is, if you don't see it then it's not there? Please read on because people like you drive me a little batty... "Pain is invisible!!!"... ...I know, I know, it's shocking and many won't believe it, ever, but it's true... Seen me smiling? It hurts. Seen me having coffee with a friend? It hurts. Seen me walking up the street? It hurts. Seen me having a glass of wine? It hurts. Seen my online social activity? It hurts doing that. Heard I went away for the weekend? It hurts... more. Did I email you? It hurt...
You can't beat it, don't even try and argue with me on this one. The toilet is most certainly THE best seat in the house (well my house for sure, actually come to think of it, any house or place I go to).