Or my nervous system's fault either. Have you ever let your mind wander beyond the boundaries of chronic pain research? I can't help it, my mind flies around all over the place! Today, it's in Maroni, a village in Larnaca Cyprus. That's where my mum was born. I've been wondering alot about village life lately. And more specifically about my grandmother (Giagia) and her lifestyle in Maroni. I've visited Cyprus four times – each time without pain! I really love mum's village Maroni, it's beautiful. I always make a point of walking around the whole village when I visit so am very familiar with its nostalgic, stony, dry characteristics. I love the feeling of my feet on the ground in Maroni – not sure what that is. Perhaps a memory...
I'm closing the door on the 'reasoning rooms' and I'm not going to investigate what might have caused a sudden flare. 'Soula, let's not go there. Don't enter that routine. Don't walk towards the dead end. Don't waste your time... again!' 'You've wasted years, Soula. Over a decade in fact thinking in rooms that provided no answers. They are mostly empty – blank walls, no windows, no air to breath!'
8am – 12noon tradies here ‘fixing’ heating/cooling unit (making noise, causing disruption and breaking much-needed silence). + Phone calls, all day (important, relating to mum’s future care plan). + Huge tree on [...]
I keep on learning about my sensitivities – it’s mind-boggling! Had someone told me I’d feel the difference between a smooth-surfaced road and a rough-surfaced road while travelling in a car I [...]
Being resourceful is what makes the difference — it is so hard working life out. But Theo and do it. We burrow down and we make it happen. There's no choice... or rather there was but I didn't want a fulltime WorkSafe paycheck. Of course, I think about that. And of course, I often call myself stupid for declining it – I was safe! I had that full-time paycheck for the rest of my life. But creativity and sharing the day with Theo is so precious to both of us. Even with the complexities and risks, it appears to be the only way Theo and I can live. For this, I am grateful! So I'll stop complaining now and go on with what I've been doing and what I am achieving. It's all good! I'm moving. Life is in forward motion after being so still for so long – a decade at least!
There was no rushing to catch transport! And the sounds of Venice are soothing and happy. In the morning we woke to the sounds of the local's footsteps and the sounds of them working along the canal. Local chatter in the street, dogs barking and of course, the church bells. Sounds impact a person with a chronic illness. My mind was at peace, it felt rested, all was calming and gentle.